MY FIRST LOVE

HANA

 HELLO, my name is Hana Adinda im from class 8F my guidance teacher is Mrs. Ari.This is my story about my first love. . .

He was my first love, even though I didn't meet him in person. I got to know him through the Roblox game group, we were acquainted for only 5 days, very short right?.

A short introduction does not mean a short relationship, I had a relationship with him on August 6, 2020, let's call him Athar. 

I also know Athar's friends in real life, such as Farrel, Daffa and Kemal. Actually there are many more I know, but I'm only close to them, I'm close to them because I often play playerunknown's battlegrounds (PUBG).

Athar is really good, taking his time to play Roblox with me, but I also play other games like Mobile Legends (ML), and PUBG, I know Athar's cellphone is not strong enough to upload both, but he still wants to try to play with me.

We have had several conflicts in our relationship, such as Athar and I being bored, busy or jealous but eventually we also get along again. 

On February 11, 2021 our relationship ended, nicely. . . 

[11/2 18.30] athrr: I accepted you as a girlfriend based on love, now based on the sincerity of love I am breaking our relationship. Dating is closer to adultery, whereas everything that brings ugliness is not the purpose of love.

Believe me, separation is a wise choice before we are cursed by Allah Swt because we both have not matured in interpreting the essence of the glory of love. Indeed, the perfection of love is to pray for each other's safety until fate brings us together in a household bond.

Isn't it the worst of lovers if they are unable to keep their thoughts, words and actions from everything that has the potential to plunge the soul into the puddle of adultery. Because of that, we should realize with sincerity that keeping each other pure until marriage is the biggest responsibility that must be borne.

Choosing to separate does not mean no respect for the feelings that once grew in the chest, but an effort to make those feelings grow in their proper place. Growing love in prayer, in awareness and inner resignation to maintain the purity of a love until we are grateful for our ability to be faithful even though there is no form of courtship.

I love you because of Allah Swt, so I surrender to Him to take care of you until His time comes to deliver you as a real halal life partner for me. Insha Allah, even if in the end I am not your soul mate, it is actually the most beautiful path that He has set. Because it could be that what is best for us is not necessarily the best for Him.

 I'm afraid of losing you, that's for sure! But I'm more afraid of losing Allah Swt from my heart. Moreover, my fear is justified, because if I am more afraid of losing you than losing Allah Swt, then I am not the person who deserves to be your life companion. Don't you need a life partner who can work together to get to His heaven? The essence of perpetuating love is not limited to our lives, but also until we die and are reunited in heaven.

Please understand; my great love for you is the main basis for my decision. I want to honor you with the glory of love that is truly blessed by Allah SWT. Bismillah, let us both let our hearts go our separate ways in order to reach His love for our more perfect love.

I thought we could still be together, friends or something. . .

But it seems he got bored and left me. To be honest to forget him is very difficult until now maybe I still love him, half of my heart for him.